Thursday, January 01, 2009

Another chance, another start, so many dreams to tease the heart










Happy New Year.

My friend R was nice enough to invite me to a party held in a leafy (well, not at this time of year) neighborhood of Asbury Park, a renowned "gay enclave" on the Monmouth County shore. I was anxious about it being full of judgmental and prissy gays (my issues, my issues), but reality couldn't have been more warm, welcoming, and suburban. There was even a dad with a very cute toddler in tow. Cocktail shrimp, stuffed mushrooms, and sangria were on offer. Anxiety was never so undeserved.

Needless to say, I had a nice time. We all even got little individual Ziploc bags full of 12 grapes each to pop into our mouths at midnight, as one of the hosts was Cuban-American.

2009: I look forward to it as a year of deep housecleaning.

R thinks I'm crazy, but I'm more determined than ever to move back to the Garden State. As I told one of the partygoers last night, it's either that or moving to the Bay Area (or Portland, Oregon?) for a decade or so. The problem is that those locations are just as far from my family, and that really has become a concern. I want to be able to pop over for Sunday (or Wednesday) dinner anytime I want.

The Job has also reached a point at which it makes sense to break it off, though that is certainly the main cause of anxiety. Unemployment and possible loss or reduction of health coverage needs to be handled delicately. It feels like jumping into the deep end. But I believe that it's time.

Also, New York was so much fun last weekend. And though I realize that "fun" can be had rather easily on a weekend jaunt almost anywhere (and that quotidian boredom can set in anywhere), the other part of the equation is that it is something new -- a place to discover all over again.

A sense of discovery and thrill has really been missing from life for awhile. A change in geography isn't the only way to correct that, I know, but I'm pretty sure it's the direction I want to take.

Yes, it's difficult. However, I received enthusiastic support from a couple of new lesbian acquaintances, so who am I to let them down?

And on that note, best wishes to you for 2009, my "handful" of faithful readers. I'll keep you posted.

For now, I'm heading back to Santa Barbara tomorrow evening.

8 comments:

LadrĂ³n de Basura (a.k.a. Junk Thief) said...

Happy 2009. I hope we meet over pupusas or such in the new year before you head east. Though having another blogger bud in the East is not a bad thing.

rptrcub said...

Happy 2009! I've enjoyed reading your blog as well as your JMG comments (this is actually Jeremy (now from Atlanta)) on JMG.

Salty Miss Jill said...

So, what was the result of your 12 grapes?
I beckon you from the East! Let's hope we can both mnanage to be in the same place at the same time, yes?

SubtleKnife said...

Dear Joe,

I hope you weren't Blinded by the Light Growin' Up with Mary Queen of Arkansas, wondering Does This Bus Stop at 82nd Street? whilst getting Lost in the Flood.

But on the other side The Angel has something For You in the shape of a Spirit in the Night, because we all know It's Hard to Be a Saint in the City.

Love and all the best wishes for 2009,

MJ

Papagayo said...

Happy New Year Joe! I took a break not only from work but also from the web- it was loverly. All the best, hope the move preparations are fun and exciting for you...x

Huntington said...

Happy New Year, to you as well, and thanks for my prezzie. Whether it's in N.J. or S.F. or PDX, mostest happiness to you in 2009.

MissLynette said...

A sense of discovery and thrill has really been missing from life for awhile. A change in geography isn't the only way to correct that, I know, but I'm pretty sure it's the direction I want to take.

i hope so. i have a good feeling about you and new jersey. happy new year, sweet man.

Anonymous said...

California is overrated. I support you in your decision to move back east (where I wish my family lived!).